Butterflies Speak, You Just Need to Listen.

[Papillon]

This'll be just a whole collection of my works in the coming days. Sure this thread may not seem like much now, but I'll get some things up.

Plus, I update my website a lot by putting a lot of what I write there.

So... enjoy, I guess.

[Papillon]

DEAR SUE.

This is a song I wrote for my father when I read the heartsick letter he wrote to my mother. Most of it is based off of that letter, and he even put Jimmy Buffett lyrics in there (in italics). So here's my country ballad entitled 'Dear Sue'.


It's now 8:10, I'm up again
I know inside my heart is missin'
I'm oh so lonely...
It's okay with me
If you let me be
And fly back to him, untethered free
But I'm oh so lonely...

[CHORUS:]
I'm watching the clock tick the time away
Hoping you will call me.
I convince myself it'll be all right
But even Buffett sounds like the blues tonight.

I've tried to read, but I read your cards
They're sitting on my dresser drawers
My luck's runnin' out...
It's now 8:20 - your phone line's busy
Never knowing what you're doing just drives me crazy
Cause my luck's running out...

[CHORUS]

But who am I to tell you
To put your future on hold
And wait for me?
And who am I to beat me up
And kill myself just wondering if
You'll wait?

"I feel like I'm stranded here on a sand bar
Stuck in my tracks like a street car
Playing it for all that it's worth
Paying for my sins on Earth."

It's now 8:35 - the line's still busy
No need to worry, even though I'm dizzy
I'm a survivor.
I've lived through many broken hearts
Had them mended, gotten me some brand new parts,
I'm a survivor.

[CHORUS]

8:45 - Still busy
9:00 - Still busy.
I'm praying you'll walk in and ask me
'Will you stay the night
So that Buffett sounds nothin like the blues tonight.'

"Some of it's magic
Some of it's tragic
But I've had a good life all the way."

"All my love..."
"Ken."

[Papillon]

UNCONDITIONAL LOVE.

This is a sonnet I wrote for English class about a past crush I had. I personally hate this piece, but what is one man's trash is another's treasure.


My lord, my savior, mine eyes plunge to thee,
A fickle youth with the song of a lark.
How well dost thou know of my wildest plea,
A mere light dissipating to the dark?
Cornflower hair for my dull nails to rake,
Jagged pools of crystal doth scar my eyes.
A song; a gay limerick for ears to take,
A heavenly aura to hypnotize.
Not the finest of gods would dare to spar,
Nor the bravest of mortals who scour.
In you I find me 'fore I fell to mar,
To relinquish the glory, the power.
But yet, unto you, 'tis only a loan.
I shall love thee, forever on my own.

[Papillon]

STIRRINGS.

This poem got my whole circle of friends talking. Of course, I was thinking about the book The Giver at the time and thought of the main character and his growing thoughts on his friend. So here we go.


I dreamed a dream last night.
I dreamed of her again.

I stroked her hair and saw it change...
-to red
-to curly
-to fine

And I wanted her closer.
I wanted.

But still, she resisted me with...
-a shake of the head
-a shy little smile
-and the word 'no'

And I yearned for her body.
I yearned.

But sleep began to wash over her image...
-her red hair
-her impish grin
-her ivory skin

And I lusted for her again.
I lusted.


[But the light of day stole her.]

[Papillon]

ONLY I.

When I read the webcomic Cursed Moons, I got the inspiration to write a poem, also using some feelings of my own.


I can see the dark side of the moon.
I can feel the air grow ever colder.
Ghosts of the past fall at my feet.

But only I can see them.

Glossy eyed, I face the news.
I listen to them with blocked ears.
Voices cry out not too far off.

But only I can hear them.

My tears fall hollowed from my cheeks.
They fall to the ground and flood my room.
I drown within my hurricane.

But you cannot understand.
And nor can I.

[Papillon]

PINING AWAY.

This was a creative piece I wrote for English class. I guess it's in some form of a sonnet, not sure if it's homebread or not. So I'll just let you decide for yourself.


Leaning over for a glance, imploring softly for a chance
That I may gaze upon your eyes; a hazel that does hypnotize.
The finest gold spun through your hair; it tempts me still, but do I dare?
I cannot touch, but only see. But still, your eyes, they beckon me.

A pretty rose with clothes of silk and little teeth as white as milk,
Your supple frame sits here, unarmed, your pleasant smile has left me charmed
You look to me as I have you; a dreamy gaze that pierces thorugh.
I ask your name, but your lips part and ask me mine through echoes tart.

I reach to thee, only to clasp your fading image in my grasp.
Fruitless, I search longingly for thy face which I'd love earnestly
And, oh! my heart was ever sore to see your face forever-more.
And when you did return to me, I, again, reached out to thee.

But what I found inside the frame was nothing more than human lame.
Your hazel eyes have lost their glow, your golden hair had ceased to grow.
And, still, upon your bony face, I find a smile for to trace.
So, I guess, there is a way to stay with you and pine away...

[Papillon]

ONLY NOTCHED IN PLACES.

After trying to play softball and getting ridiculed (I'm not a sportsy person), I got the inspiration to write. And this was all done at a last moment's notice.


I hear them snickering down the aisles,
They look to me with false little smiles,
I continue on, shooting a glare.

Playing catcher, holding my ground,
My knees buckled on the mound
People stop and turn to stare.

You cannot break me with your faces.
I'm only notched in certain places.

Glossy eyes overlook the test,
And pass with scores above the rest,
Envious kids leer my way.

You can see me drop my books,
You recalled those dirty looks;
I truly thought I'd cry today.

But you can't break me with your faces.
I'm only notched in certain places.


[And you almost nailed it.]

[Papillon]

JUST A DOLL.

Dedicated this to a kid in my class. Nothing special.


Used.
Abused.
I feel
Accused.

I lay
Motionless
In rags
Beady eyes gaze out to oblivion.

Spiraling, spiraling... ever faster.

Busted seams
Grow
And grow beyond repair.
The blades of the ceiling fan mesmerize

Spiraling, spiraling... ever faster.

Used.
Abused.
I feel
Accused.

Just a doll.
I'm just a doll.

[Papillon]

THE HERO I LONG TO SEE.

This is a short ballad dedicated to Klaus, the little ghost that opens my doors and keeps me from running back to my mom and dad whenever I feel alone.


I see his face in pitch black morn,
Velvet eyes withdrawn and shy.
I lie awake, dismayed, forlorn,
This child tells me not to cry.

A silent whimper lingers here,
Covers slip from my feeble hold.
He tells me that I've naught to fear;
Cradled inside a peaceful hold.

But in the light, the shadows fade,
And something aches inside of me.
Lingering on vows he made;
The hero that I long to see.

[Papillon]

PIANO WALTZ.

Ah. Piano Waltz. Another attempt at writing a song. This one is for a story I'm writing.


Every chord
Rings on forever
Inside my mind

Interlude
Rings on forever
Inside my mind

[Let ivory complement ebony
As fingers dance upon their skin]

Dance with me, Dance with me
My morbid symphony,
Let the music drown your soul...

Sing with me, sing with me
Sadistic symphony,
Let our voices loose control...

Never Bored
Let the pianist
Ease your sorrow

Never Brood
Let the pianist
Ease your sorrow

[Let ivory complement ebony
As fingers dance upon their skin]

Dance with me, Dance with me
My morbid symphony,
Let the music drown your soul...

Sing with me, sing with me
Sadistic symphony,
Let our voices loose control...

[The Piano Waltz continues on
Even when the pianist is gone.]

[Papillon]

USELESS.

.........


I've closed my eyes
Taking everything
Piece
By Piece

All around me
People drop like flies
One
By One

Can I reach out
And keep them steady
Hand
In Hand?

The sad truth is
My touch is feeble
To
Them all

I feel so useless.

[Drachestahl]

Wow...all your poems are good...erm...what else can I say?

[Papillon]

Nothing really... because they should all BURN. >D

... >> Yes.

[Drachestahl]

They can't burn. They're immortal. shutting up.

[Papillon]

Yeah. I guess you're right. *le sigh*

--

ASHER x FALLON:
CHANGE YOUR MIND.

If you all loved me (like I know you do!) and read No Outlet, you'd know that I tried not to pair Asher and Fallon so much as I do outside the story, but I just can't help it! THEY'RE SO SLASHABLE IT MAKES MY EYES BURN!... Ahem. Yeah. Maybe some Killers lyrics in there, too. Hnn.


The silence enveloped two boys lying next to each other, both with eyes closed, watching the sunbeams twirl and glimmer in the beck of their eyelids. But as soon as the cool air swept over his flushed face, Fallon's eyes fluttered open, beautiful blue eyes focusing in the still of the night.

Racey days... help me through the hopeless haze, but my oh my...

He sat himself up, bedsheets spilling off his bare chest. He drew his pale arms slowly up and linked them around his knees. The moonlight curved around his rosy face, highlighting those eyes of his and catching the glistening perspiration upon his rounded shoulders. Stray ebon locks began to coil around his neck in the heat; it looked very mousy without his bandana to cover it up. But he wasn't thinking about this. What he was thinking about was his Aunt Beatrice. Beatrice, who cast him out... Beatrice, who grew bigoted in her heart... Beatrice, who hated her nephew.

Tragic eyes... I can't even recognize myself behind...

"Ash," he whispered softly, leaning over his partner's back to batter at his cheek, "Asher, wake up."

The white-haired boy came to with a groan, knuckes rubbing at the corners of his eyes. Fallon smiled weakly and crawled closer toward him. After he was completely awake, Asher pulled him even closer to him, fingers tracing down his arms and massaging his shoulders gently. "Hmm?" he asked, "what's wrong?"

Fallon tensened at his touch, but gradually relaxed himself. "It's about Aunt Bea. She won't let you back in my house now... and she won't let me go back, either."

So if the answer is no, can I change your mind?

"Well, she kinda has a point, love." He rested his chin on Fallon's shoulder, silvery tresses draped over him. "After all, it was a very awkward introduction, right? They come home and find you and me on the floor, just about ready to go at it."

He grinned wryly when the warmth of his face heightened against his forehead.

"And I flew out the window and hit my head," Asher added with a bit of a whine, retreating his head. Fallon turned around and crawled behind him, fingers raking through his hair. "Where'd you hit it?" A hiss answered him. He gently kissed the bruise before slipping back into his spot in Asher's lap.

Out again... a siren screams at half past ten, but you won't let go...

"But seriously, Asher. I'm worried she won't let me back. And she thinks you're trying to kidnap me, rape me..." his voice trails off, head hanging low.

The fingers that massaged his shoulders snaked around his waist, a ripe kiss caressing the back of his neck. For the longest while, the boy sat moaning softly with his eyes closed, mesmerized by the gentle sway of their bodies as the kisses became more hungry and the grip around him tightened. But as the tension got too high and Asher's hands turned Fallon around and pulled him on top of his stomach, he turned away from him, eyes downcast. "No."

While I ignore... that we both felt like this before it starts to show...

He stopped, breathing labored. "No? But... but you've always wanted this, right?"

He rolled off of him, lying on his side. "Not under these circumstances." With a heavy sigh, Fallon turned around, eyebrows wrung in distress. "Asher... I don't think we should see each other for a while..."

The words hit Asher like a pile of bricks. "Fallon?... you... you mean you're breaking up with me?"

So if I had a chance, would you let me know?

When the proposition was sent back at him, Fallon flinched, keeping his eyes closed and throat parched as he nodded. "Only for a little while. Until I can change Aunt Beatrice's mind about letting you in."

But Asher was still reeling. They were breaking up? He tried again, this time running his knuckes down Fallon's cheeks affectionately. He pulled them away to find them wet with tears. He frowned, wiping them away with his index finger. "You really don't want to do this, do you?"

The boy shook his head no.

Why aren't you shaking? Step back in time graciously taken-- oh, you're too kind...

His fingers then tilted Fallon's head up for his lips to meet his own in a sensual kiss. "But can't we be together for tonight?" he asked quietly, wintergreen eyes pleading. These, of course, were the words of a broken hearted boy who needed solace in this sad, black striped tangerine room. Fallon tried to smile, but his lips quivered and gave up along the way. He simply wrapped his arms around Asher in a comforting hug that he returned. It wasn't long before the two lapsed into a sleepy silence underneath the continuous sweep of the ceiling fan.

And if the answer is no, can I change your mind?

The sun was barely up when the boys woke, although the skies outside the hazy window were a striking puce and peach. Once Fallon had tugged his shirt back over his head and Asher had pulled his pajama pants back up, they both filed up to have some cereal in the kitchen. Neither spoke a word to the other, nor did they look into the other's eye. When they would-- when they spaced out and found themselves making eye contact --they would quickly look away, faces pink. Asher could agree with Fallon... it just wasn't the same being friends, even if it was for this short while. And once dishes were away, Fallon was to leave before Laramie woke up in the next room over.

Asher now stood silently at the door, waiting for his friend to finish tying his shoes. And once he did, he gathered up his knapsack and stood in front of him, eyes to the carpet. "I'll just tell Bea that I broke up with you so I can go back..."

"But why would you want to go back?"

Fallon looked up at this. "Well, I can't keep living here with you and Lara, can I?"

Asher looked somewhat hopeful. "If you wanted. But I understand you need to be with your family. They're the only ones you've got, just like I have Lara." He swallowed, squeezing his eyes shut briefly before clasping his hands on Fallon's shoulders to make sure he had his attention. "So if you change your mind and you want to come back here and be a part of our family..."

We're all the same and love is blind. The sun is gone before it shines...

Fallon smiled... this was the warmest smile he had given Asher since that night at his house. He swiftly gave him a peck on the cheek and reached for the door knob. "I'll think about it."

Click.

Asher touched his cheek gingerly, flushing red. He and Fallon wouldn't be broken up for a long time after all. A few days... but what's a few days?

And if the answer is no, can I change your mind?